Cabin Pride

I know there are a lot of uber conservative freaks out there who think they have an idea of what the gays do when they get together- most of which is their fantasy, not ours. So, for my gentle readers, I have documented what utter depravity can happen when about 40 or so gay men and two very patient lesbians get together in the north woods of Wisconsin for Cabin Pride. On with the sickness and depravity:

These two are our friends Peter and Duane, co-hosts of the Cabin Pride festivities. Curt and I have known them for about 10 years. Wonderful guys who love dogs and have a cabin about 25 minutes from our own. Here is how the day went:

10:00 A.M.: Brunch at Peter & Duane's neighbors, Doug and Bill. Of course we had brunch. The gays invented brunch and we are proud of it.

11:00 A.M.: Parade!! Yes, we love a parade. This one was small but had many elements of bigger more populated parades. Here are some highlights.Every gay parade must start with a dyke on bike. This was no exception. This was Nell, of Nell & Laurie who live up the road from Doug & Bill. They are the sweetest things you could ever meet. She and Laurie have had a cabin in the woods for over 20 years. We're going to take them out bar hopping in Minong some evening. We might get in early that night as there are three bars in town, four if you count Grandma Links, which is like Perkins with beer.

Flag corps!! Fabulous! They spent several minutes before the parade started practicing their choreography and it showed. What they lacked in precision, they made up for in enthusiasm.

At the end of the cul de sac, they gave us some thrilling moves set to music. It consisted mostly of one guy barking out commands like "Circle! Flags up! Flags down! Maypole! Maypole!" and the others obeying. It was fun and lovely.

Every gay parade must have royalty. This was Ruby, Queen of the Bogs, from Stone Lake, WI, home of Cranberry Festival. She threw craisins instead of candy.

What Wisconsin event would be complete without a meat raffle? This gentleman was advertising for the event that would happen later in the day.

Here is the one and only float titled "Wisconsin Bait & Ballet." I'm not sure how the two go together, but it was a pretty float. The crowd went wild.

After several years of this, the straight neighbors had to join in. These are the token heterosexuals blowing kisses to the crowd.

12:00: GAMES!!If there are children watching, this would be the point where you might want to turn their little eyes away, because things get really out there and sick at this point. In this game, one partner had to put a plastic cup on his head, while the other partner had to blow a pink marshmallow out a tube with the objective of knocking the glass off the other's head. And they did this right out before God and everyone! Can you imagine?

Next was the water balloon toss. Here is Curt catching a water balloon. I had to use the sports setting on my camera to capture the fast paced action.

Here are more water balloon catchers.

2:00: Floating in the lake. CANCELLED due to crappy, cold weather. Instead, most of the crowd descended on a bar called the Crow Bar that is about 5 miles from anywhere on a highway somewhere in Wisconsin.

I was a little wary about 40 gay men just dropping in to take over their volley ball court and bar. But, you know what? Not one person in that bar deep in rural Wisconsin even flinched when we showed up, even the big guys with their mean looking girlfriends. The bartender even brought out two free rounds of frozen pudding shots for the crowd. And of course, the gays loved the place because mixed drinks were only $2 for regular liquor and $2.50 for top shelf liquor.

The bar even provided us with Polish horseshoes. I like that bar.

4:00: Meat raffle!!

The meat raffle was held back at Peter and Duane's place. It was basically meat bingo, but we let them call it a raffle anyway. Of course, the crowd went wild every single time O-69 was called. It's a tradition I guess.

After the meat raffle, was a fantastic dinner put together by Peter & Duane, followed by karaoke and dancing. Curt and I skipped out after dinner to go take care of the dogs. All in all a very satisfying day with very kind, fun people. How sick and twisted is that?

I Love a Parade

It was a little too chilly to swim at the lake this weekend. So, Curt and I thought we might take in the Spooner Rodeo Days parade. Yee haw! Here are the "highlights." If you find no highlights, well, don't be surprised. Neither did we. But we did get a lot of candy thrown at us after looking sad and holding out our hands. Fun.
The parade started with lots and lots of horses. It was Rodeo Days after all. Lots of poop and a little pee and these dazzling chaps.

A huge military display followed the horses. Family friendly parade my ass!

Amery, WI has the laziest bunch of royalty ever. They couldn't even lift their elbows to wave. They may as well have been passed out in a pile of Schlitz cans and cigarette butts on that float. Boooo. At least they dressed up.

Bad ass with Fez. Apparently Shriners have left behind their little cars for a dancing scooters. They did some nice formations, but it just wasn't as fun as little cars. I'm guessing as the Shriners age it is harder to get in and out of the little cars. Next year, electric wheelchairs.

Did you see the pictures of this guy that I posted at my bird feeders earlier this year. Cool.

Huh. How was this pageant judged? SIZE PERHAPS??? That is wrong. Wrong.

Again, the fat girl got second runner up. Hmpf.

If I have to walk one more step in this god forsaken moose costume, I'll.....

Sadly, only two marching bands showed up for the parade. The hometown band sort of bit the bag. This one was much better. I love percussion sections.

This "royalty" float, celebrating white trash obviously, was a little funny. Why? Because the two crown losers, I mean runners up, at the front were doing this staged "seig heil" sort of wave really fast and the queen at the back of the float was saying "You're waving too fast! Too fast!" The losers laughed and waved faster. They hated their queen.

These sad sacks showed up in the the middle of all the merriment with the downer signs and an even worse singer being pulled on a garden cart singing some maudlin tune. The whole crowd rolled their eyes, dug in their purses, went to get beverages, except for one lady across the street who started clapping loudly. As you know, I'm fine with expressing one's beliefs, but pick the right place and time. Merriment is not the right time for this message. And what does that sign mean anyway? That you were desperate for a rhyme?

This was a pretty cow. I like cows.

We were two blocks in on the parade route and already these kids carried the unmistakable expressions that said "I'm booooooored. I'm hooooooooott. I'm tiiiiiired." Kid, you wanted to be in the damn parade, so shape up. Smile. Get with the program or I'll take the car aerial after you.

FINALLY, the judges got it right. Hefty royalty! HOLLA!!

This large princess was second runner up but looked like more fun than any of them combined. She was having a good old time on the float. Next year. Next year.

And that about sums up the parade. Not really exciting but I'm glad we went.