Monday, February 16, 2009

The New Office Hero

At about 1:00, the benevolent C bursts into my office and says "Have you talked to Joe Blo yet?!?!?!" (Name changed to protect the innocent.) I said no and asked what's up. C says that she can't tell me, impatiently looks around for Joe, looks back at me and says "I better go get him!" and runs away at full speed.
A few minutes later she reappears and proclaims "I can't find him, but he has to talk to you."
"About what?"
"I can't say, but it's really cool?"
"Well, C, the only thing worth this excitement would be that he has a parasitic twin on his back with gnashing teeth."
C gets really a really excited look on her face and says "Not quite, but almost!"
This launches me out of my chair and we embark on a quest for Joe Blo, who we find in his office. So here's what C was so excited about:

9 months ago, Joe went to Egypt with a friend and came back with some gastrointestinal distress. He and I had talked about it about a month ago and all the things he's tried to alleviate the weird symptoms. Anyway, he finally lands in the hospital last week and the doctors eventually do a CT scan on his abdomen and find..... get ready... you're going to love this....

He told us that the doctor could see some that measured about 15 inches. Oh my god. Better yet, he explained that when they lay eggs, the larvae enter the bloodstream, go to the lungs and get coughed up and swallowed back into the gut to live out their lives. Eeewww! Best of all, he said he could feel them moving around in his gut. Motherlode!!! We were enthralled to say the least! However, apparently these little bastards can be quite dangerous, causing intestinal blockages, etc. Worse yet, since they are in his gut, his blood, his lungs, etc., he has to be treated with a drug that is basically chemotherapy with all the nasty-lose-your-hair-with-nausea-to-boot side effects. C and I walked away, quite satisfied with our cheap thrill, vowed not to treat him as a circus sideshow and quietly returned to work.

7 comments:

Endurance Diva said...

Motherlode indeed!!!! Would have been better if the urban myth were true and he could coax one out of his nostrils by smelling a chocolate malt.

Poor guy, actually.

Endurance Diva said...

Oops! The endurance diva is me - Mnmom. I have another blog now, in addition to Happy Iowa

themom said...

Mnmom is trying to drive me nuts I see!! Let's see I was in Egypt last May - hmmm, that would be nine months ago. Now I'm feeling ILL!!!

janban said...

ewwwwwww!!! Are you kidding me? Oh Gross! Sounds like an episode of Creature Feature. I don't think I will sleep well tonight.

Amy said...

just gross is all I can say.

brenda k said...

I have seen a lot of worms under the microscope in my day to day employment - I would love to get a gander at one that could flop off the slide like a grass snake! LOL

CATCH IT! THERE IT GOES INTO SURGERY!

(My word verifications is "crynasm". The definition of a crynasm is the state you find yourself in after finding out you have reptiles living in your gut. Crysnasm.

michaelg said...

Click on the words GIANT INTESTINAL ROUNDWORMS to see a picture.