Saturday, March 15, 2008

America's Next Top Model Week 4

This is getting ridiculous. This week the ladies were give some runway coaching in a firehouse, while being judged by the firemen. Do firemen know what a good runway walk is? Hmmm. I think they know what a nice ass is, which might be why they were all smiles when Dominique did a hoochie MILF stroll up and down in front of them. Had the fire pole been within 10 feet, she would have been riding it like a pony. Ewww.

So, here's a dumbass thing for a designer to do: have a runway challenge in which the girls have 3 minutes to dress and accessorize themselves in his clothes then take the catwalk before an audience. What could be wrong with that, you ask? I'll tell you. Fatima, buttoned her sweater all cattywumpass, Lauren couldn't get her dress zipped up at all in the back (and can't walk in heels yet) and many outfits lacked the assigned accessories. The girl who had the easiest outfit to put on won the challenge. Duh.

It is clear to me that after 10 seasons of this competition, there are monkeys or rednecks generating ideas for the challenges. This week's photo challenge was to look like a high fashion model while posing with meat. Yes, meat. Big slabs of dead beef in a meat packing plant. Oh, but they also had to wear meat outfits- yup meat bra and panties in some cases. Oh baby, let me strip you down and eat your panties tar tare. Yes! Afterwards, I'm sure all the ladies sat on a grill and rolled around in barbecue sauce. Hot.

Anyway, Fatima, above, (who probably mentioned her circumcision several times but the editors chose to remove it) got into her meat- thank god it was beef not pork (got to show at least some respect for her being Muslim and all)- and took on the appearance of a little dog with an under bite. She was thinking she looked fierce (like a Shitzu, perhaps). Even when Mr. Jay was yelling at her to give a different face, she continued to display her lower teeth. Weird.
Lauren who is a prettied up punker chick with some low self esteem in terms of how pretty she really is, got into the meat theme. She grabbed a meat hook and cranked out some great pictures. See below:

Marvita, who I harshly criticized in my first update, is really growing on me. She hasn't threatened to throw anyone down after the first week. This is good. But I think her self esteem is growing as the competition progresses and you can just see her sort of opening up and taking it all in. I like a story like that. And, she is taking some hot pictures and can walk a runway with the best of them.

When it came time for judging, Amis, the spaz, and Fatima were in the bottom two. Hooray, Fatima! Sadly though, Amis went home. It was her time though. Maybe we can get rid of Fatima next week.


Mnmom said...

I'm old - what's a MILF??

michaelg said...

Oh dear. MILF = Mom I'd Like to F*ck.

kirelimel said...

Where is PETA when you need them?

michaelg said...

I've styled some meat panties for all of us to wear this Saturday.